There are reasons we all choose the things we do. Before you enter college/university, a job or an organisation. You have ‘make or break’ reasons that favour one choice over the other. Marriage is likewise an institution. One that perhaps you haven’t got a lot of faith in because you’ve not seen reason to join it. Yet.
I’m just a few months into the marriage, but I’ve had my share of difficulties. Yet still, I stay married. Because of the reasons, I saw before getting married are getting magnified. Those reasons are so good, I would be a fool to drop out of the institution.
So from a previous anti-marriage fan to now a pro-marriage fan, here are reasons you should enter the institution of marriage. This is a first-hand review of the Institute of Marriage. The potency of the lecturer and the benefits of being in the institute.
Marriage teaches God
The first reason you should marry – that is if you’re not one of those called to celibacy like Paul, is because marriage teaches God as you know Him and reveals Him in newer ways. In marriage, you see the providence of God in diverse ways. How He comes in to solve a problem you’ve been praying about for months. How He transforms your partner right before your eyes. Gives you both confirmations for decisions by making you think the same solution at the same time but communicate it at later times. Speaks to your heart about things to intercede for each other about. You see Him in all the little things if you want to. God manifests His timeliness, spirit of wisdom & understanding. His consistent presence and the depth of intimacy He can go with you. If you won’t marry at all, marry for the opportunity to see God manifest daily before your own eyes, mind and heart.
Marriage teaches intercession
When you get married, you become a representative of God’s love, faithfulness and unfailing mercies – renewed every morning. You get to be the person who stands in the presence of God to intercede on behalf of your spouse. Because, you see their struggles, pain, victories, pitfalls, and you have a sense in your heart of where God is taking them. You become a partner of the Holy Spirit who prays for us what we don’t know. Your spouse won’t always recognize the things they should pray for, but when you’re tuned in to God, you see it and make the move for them. It’s easier to pray specifically because you have a ‘naked and not ashamed’ perspective. There is no greater intercessor than one filled with the love of God expressed towards a spouse. It transcends a lot of things. Dare I say, it may even transcend the intercession of a missionary for souls. Because you know this soul inside out and you can cry out for them beyond words. If you wish to foster the growth of the kingdom of God through intercession, consider enrolling for the Institute of Marriage. You walk into a call of intercession first for your spouse, then your kids and eventually all the generations within yours and your spouse’s family.
Marriage enriches your calling
What is more joyous than your spouse completing your almost two years’ thoughts and prayers with a simple answer? One that ties together everything you’ve felt called to do but haven’t touched because you were unsure. Marrying a believer who is equally yoked with you in Christ allows you to receive encouragement and partnership for all God has called you to be. This is more than a career success or church service. It is that which brings you fulfilment and keeps you awake. A confirmation that leaves smiles on your face as you connect the dots based on the word your spouse spoke. Friends and family can get your idea, but none will understand your calling as truly as the bone of your bone and flesh of your flesh. It’s a unique form of support. Your calling turns out much better because you have a partner pledged to you for life. One who is around in the highs and the lows. One who isn’t going anywhere but committed to seeing you become all God has called you to be. If you desire to fulfil your calling in a mind-blowing way, consider enrolling for the Institute of Marriage.
It’s better to have a partner than go it alone.
Share the work, share the wealth.
And if one falls down, the other helps,
But if there’s no one to help, tough!
ECC 4:9-10 (MSG)
Marriage teaches true intimacy
One-night stands are cool, heck they could even be adventurous. Keeping one partner and having sex once in a while seems like a good plan. But all these amounts to no intimacy at all. True intimacy is beyond sex. It is commitment, understanding, selflessness, humility and always seeing the best in the other person. If true intimacy was all about sexual or romantic acts, then we could never be intimate with God or friends. However, we experience intimacy with a friend and an even deeper one with God. Staying in a relationship for ten years which leads nowhere robs you of time you could have spent building intimacy that transforms lives. Our intimacy with God transforms us, so does intimacy with your spouse. You become a better person who is more compassionate & loving. You become a ‘type’ of Christ. Just as He wants us to be – to mature into the fullness of the stature of Christ Jesus. If you’re looking to grow beyond where you are in your relationship with God, consider enrolling in the Institute of Marriage.
Marriage teaches love
The fruit of the Spirit is love. Love is patient, kind, doesn’t envy, long-suffering… Marriage breaks your self-love into genuine love. When you get married, you learn to put your spouse first, to attend to their needs before yours. To give them the benefit of the doubt, to celebrate their successes with them. To willingly forgive and forget all that they may have done against you. These characteristics typify love. The agape love that God encourages us to have. Not just for our spouses, but for everyone else.
Love is sleeping at 2 am but waking up at 6 am to pray with your spouse and send them off with lunch because you are committed to helping him achieve his goal of healthy eating. Love is having a training to attend later in the morning but allowing your wife to sleep in whilst you take out the trash, clean the dishes, do the laundry and clean the bathroom because you know she’s tired. Love is choosing to believe that even though your spouse made a mistake, it wasn’t to spite you or because they took you for granted.
Love puts others before self. It is what Christ did and does for us daily. It is what He requires us to do for ourselves and for others. Marriage teaches you different self-love that is beyond selfies & selfishness. Marriage teaches you to love in its purest form. If you desire to love truly, deeply and unconditionally, then consider joining the Institute of Marriage.
Marriage is an institution. Except you usually get the certificate before you enter. Showing you that the decision to make it to the end depends on you. You don’t fight for victory. You fight from victory. You have the prize, so you make the prize better over the years. It won’t be easy, but it would be enjoyable if you commit to it.
If you are afraid of marriage because of the commitment, then take courage from the commitment you’ve made to God with your life and even to your schooling over the years. Depend on Him and He’ll take you through.
If you’re shying away from marriage because you feel you don’t have the finances, think again. Consider it the way you will consider an offer for your dream course at your dream university. How will you raise the money? How soon will you raise the money? Be motivated to enter this Institute if God hasn’t called you to the Institute of Celibacy.
Marriage is an honourable thing. An honourable institution. A loving experience.
If you ever doubted why to get married, I hope this gives you room to reconsider. It’s not that deep, but it requires deep commitment to get in and stay in.